I kicked off 2021 with a 40 day Daniel fast. This is the second 40 day fast I’ve done. The first one taught me how to begin my healing and this one taught me how to release the hell that had a tight grip on my life. But there’s one thing I finally realized now that it’s December and we’re on the cusp of 2022….
I held onto what kept me in hell because it was comfortable, made me feel worthy and brought me a piece of validity I thought was important.
Hell just means separation from God.
So all hell broke loose means all that could, did, might, potentially separate me from God has detached or in the processing of detaching from me. Baby don’t get it twisted, temptation will always rear its ugly head. That’s just part of life.
The power to release became a priority for me. In the midst of despair, doubt and depression I chose to hold onto the faith God would come through for me. God has in so many ways. So. Many. Ways.
This 40 day Daniel fast broke so much open for me. The clinging to things I knew to let go of even when it was difficult had to be done. Breaking loose the hell that kept me comfortable, stuck in my rut and dependent on past success. I wanted to dream again but I can’t do that holding onto achievements that were in a once good place but now feels like hell.
All hell broke loose because I chose to honor the calling and favor on my life. With that comes a huge responsibility I grappled with all year. The loss I suffered in so many areas was painful. I did have to grieve even if other people felt it was just useless venting. My life had been my pride. I accomplished a lot in my life. By the time I was 25 I had all but 1 goal checked off. Now 12 years later I’m wondering what to do. I focused more on who I was through what I did and slowly over the years I began to focus on who I am as just me.
I enjoy blogging and going to ministry school. Hope to continue both. But I’m at a crossroads and the 40 day Daniel fast broke hell open so I could finally confront what was in me. And make a decision to get unstuck.
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